Jonce and The Angry Abscess...
Last Thursday I had an itch on my groin. Well I say 'groin', actually it's just below my waistline about where that little pocket is in the front of your Levis. And I say 'itch' - it started out as a mosquito bite but soon became infected and has how swollen and become an abscess. Big, red and painful. I showed a doctor and yesterday afternoon found myself in the Accident and Emergency Department of UCH being stared at by two (rather giggly) doctors. "It's very red, isn't it?" they said. "Yes" I said. "Is it painful?" they asked and poked it very hard. "Ouch! Very!" I said. "Hmm," they said. "We don't like to lance these things when they're hard like yours as it can lead to more infection so here is a prescription for two different types of antibiotics. It should just go away gradually over the course of the treatment. But if it doesn't or the redness and swelling starts to spread across your stomach or down your legs do come back, won't you?" "Absolutely!" I said. So your hero is left with taking a bucket full of anti-bios and a bucket full of painkillers for a week. I just hope it goes away. Quickly. It's crippling my love-life!
Before I went to A&E I popped into Mortimer Market to see if they could do anything about the afore mentioned abscess (they couldn't) and also to have a full STI check up while I was about it. I go for these things annually just as a health check. Besides which I quite fancy the nurses in there. Two hours after arriving I'd been poked, prodded, councelled, scraped and pricked. I was quite glad to get to A&E to be honest!
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