And now, Local News...
As I've been all but house-bound the last few days I've taken to reading the free local newspapers that drop through my letterbox. These organs would normally get chucked straight in the bin but when you've got time on your hands you'll read anything. Among all the adverts for local shops and taxi firms and the numerous pages of houses and flats for sale or let are those strange pieces of local news that you rarely get a chance to see anywhere else. Whether they are made up or real I have no idea. Here are a couple of examples that caught my eye.
Collecting Pokemon cards is now considered passé for many lslington primary school kids, who have outgrown the expensive Japanese cartoon characters and have a preference, instead, for swapping free prostitute cards from public telephone boxes. According to an lslington Gazette report, prostitutes have fled crackdowns in areas such as King’s Cross and headed tdwards lslington, attracting trade with their lurid X-rated cards. Concerns about the problem have reached government level, and legislation is expected soon to make “carding” a criminal offence. Spoil sports. All I needed was "Busty French Polisher" to complete my set.
Poilice were called to restore order after offers of a telly for 99p sparked mayhem. Bargain hunters camped outside a new 99p Stores outlet in Seven Sisters Road, Holloway, in sub-zero temperatures after managers pledged to sell TVs and videos for less than a quid. But by the 10am opening times things had got out of hand when a crowd of several hundred began jostling for position. Worried staff managers had to call for police to maintain order. Karim Lalani, chief executive of 99p Stores, said: "This is our first store - hence we did not realise just how enthusiastic people would be for this offer. We will do it differently next time." Oh really? Apparently they had just one TV to sell for 99p. Sound like canny marketing.