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"Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake - Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956)"

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

The Top Ten Worst Movie Sex Scenes...


It's official: the pool romp scene from Showgirls - featuring Elizabeth Berkley and Kyle MacLachlan going at it like two dolphins caught in a tuna net - is the crappiest movie sex scene of all time.

In awarding the crown to Paul Verhoeven's lamentable waste of celluloid, Empire magazine has at least ensured that it will go down in history for something besides possibly being the worst film ever made. An Empire spokesman said of the outrage: "It's supposed to be the best sex in the world but, as Berkley thrashes around in the water, it looks more like the first ten minutes of Jaws."

The top ten went like this:
Showgirls: Elizabeth Berkley and Kyle MacLachlan (1995)
Damage: Jeremy Irons and Juliette Binoche (1992)
Killing me Softly: Heather Graham and Joseph Fiennes (2002)
Body of Evidence: Madonna and Willem Dafoe (1993)
Crimes of Passion: Kathleen Turner (1984)
The Specialist: Sharon Stone and Sly Stallone (1994)
Gigli: Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez (2003)
40 Days and 40 Nights: Matt Sullivan and Shannyn Sossamon (2002)
Matrix Reloaded: Keanu Reeves and Carrie-Ann Moss (2003)
The Stud: Joan Collins and Oliver Tobias (1978)

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