Quote Of The Day

"Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake - Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956)"

Friday, April 04, 2003

I'm going into hospital to have surgery today. This afternoon in fact. No, not cosmetic surgery! And not major surgery either. In fact the spin doctors and spin nurses have been to work on what they call it. It's now called Minor Invasive Therapy. And consequently I'm going to a Minor Invasive Therapy Unit to have it done. When they say 'minor' it is; I have a small sebaceous cyst on my neck that needs removing. The term 'invasive' is probably fair too; they will have to actually cut me open and I guess that is pretty invasive. The term 'therapy' I do have a problem with though. A doctor is going to sharpen up with scalpel and cut me open with a butcher. Now I don't know about you but I don't call that 'therapy'! I call that surgery!

Anyway I hate doctors. Correction: I hate going to the doctors. Hospitals too. They scare me. People die in hospitals. Doctors give you bad news. So I'm more than a little nervous about today's procedure. I've not met enough surgeons to have formed an opinion about them. But I suspect I'll be just as nervous when I meet my one this afternoon.

Oh and 'Nil By Mouth'? Bollocks. I fancy a stiff drink this lunchtime to steady my nerves!

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